Ben Robinson

All About Ben

By Ben Robinson

I’ve had a few problems today with my computer. I saved my column, and even called it up to send it to Zack so he could build the Opinion page. But somehow I lost the file, somewhere on my hard drive.

I’ve checked with the guys who actually understand these computers, Rocky and Zack. Both agree that I have lost my column. They’re too busy doing the actual work of the paper to search for some dumb guy’s column. They are doing what we need smart people for, and both qualify for that title.

Me? I am the dumb guy who offers comic relief. I’ve done it for years, although I used to get laughs by saying things that were so clever everybody laughed. Now I get those uncomfortable laughs where you can tell people are thinking “he’s not really that dumb, is he?”

Well, yes I am. If I ever have the misfortune of fathering children, I can give up on them getting their looks or their brains from me. Of course, that will put the kids relying on a woman not smart enough to avoid me, but that’s the breaks.

This all started yesterday when our file server was down. You can guess how much help I was then. While others were trying to keep the newspaper running, I was simply trying to save one file.

And apparently I failed.

My column was about me having a bunch of stories to do and trying to cover Monday’s Martin Luther King events. I wrote that I enjoyed the MLK events, in part because of the message being spread, and in part because of some of the good-looking women in attendance. It was a positive event, allowing me to see many people I had not seen in years.

Fortunately I wrote the story this morning and got it to Zack before I could lose it. It came time to place my column, which I had written Monday. That’s when I lost the article.

So this week my goal is to write a few of these stories I had planned to get this week, write a good column, and then avoid losing it. If that works out, we’ll consider looking up one of the pretty girls I saw at the MLK ceremony. But I need to prove to myself my worthiness for consideration.